I think it's funny how I'm learning that for me life is not about the end, it's about the process.
I want to work with young kids. I want a husband one day. I want to be successful. I want to live in Africa.
These are all goals and maybe one day i'll achieve them,but, it's the process of getting to them in where the enjoyment lies. It's the education of being a teacher, it's seeing Africa for the first time and falling in love with it, it's getting burned by guys so I want that good guy even more. It's all the process.
It's me failing my drivers test, bombing an presentation, not getting the job, learning when to let go, learning how to move on that makes me learn how to be strong, laugh at myself, and cope with life. Eventually maybe I'll be that successful independent woman with a hot husband by my side teaching kids in Africa, or maybe not, but I'm trying to take in the process of everything.
Sometimes I think we get so caught up in the end goal. That we forget to live in the NOW. What if this is it? Would I be content?
I have no clue where I'll end up in life, but I'm sure it'll be a crazy process getting there. And you know what's funny? I have a hunch this process never ends.
Saturday, April 30, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
When It Hits
Don't you love when it hits? All of it.
Life, boys,family, school comes crashing down on you. I have a good life, but still I have those moments when it hits. Those moments where you hurt. Those moments where everything is overwhelming and you don't know what you're doing. Where the past comes to haunt you. It all hits.
It punches, it kicks, it makes you cry, scream, hate, love, laugh.Like an ninja it sneaks up on you and pulls a move you never saw coming.
I'm not trying to be overly dramatic. I love my life and i'm so blessed. There are a lot of people with much bigger problems than me, but it still hits.
Those moments where you're so unsure of your future, past, present. Where you're headed, where you are, or if you're in reverse.
I think it's these moments I have nowhere to turn to except God. He's there, waiting.
So, now the moment has passed, the tears are fading away, and I'll just live my happy life again. But who knows when that ninja is gonna attack?
"But the Salvation of righteousness is of the Lord: He is their strength in time of trouble. And the Lord shall help them, and deliver them: He shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in Him." Psalm 37:39-40
Also, my parents surprised me with a car. A 1992 Toyota Camry :) I love them so much!!!!! See, my life is blessed :)
Life, boys,family, school comes crashing down on you. I have a good life, but still I have those moments when it hits. Those moments where you hurt. Those moments where everything is overwhelming and you don't know what you're doing. Where the past comes to haunt you. It all hits.
It punches, it kicks, it makes you cry, scream, hate, love, laugh.Like an ninja it sneaks up on you and pulls a move you never saw coming.
I'm not trying to be overly dramatic. I love my life and i'm so blessed. There are a lot of people with much bigger problems than me, but it still hits.
Those moments where you're so unsure of your future, past, present. Where you're headed, where you are, or if you're in reverse.
I think it's these moments I have nowhere to turn to except God. He's there, waiting.
So, now the moment has passed, the tears are fading away, and I'll just live my happy life again. But who knows when that ninja is gonna attack?
"But the Salvation of righteousness is of the Lord: He is their strength in time of trouble. And the Lord shall help them, and deliver them: He shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in Him." Psalm 37:39-40
Also, my parents surprised me with a car. A 1992 Toyota Camry :) I love them so much!!!!! See, my life is blessed :)
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